Luckily I'm still seeing CS. He came over last night and at first he was distant but after playing our game for a bit he became affectionate. Then he grabbed me and started kissing my neck and holding me which then turned into a wrestling match. At one point he had both my hands in his and I was trying to get free so I asked if I could have my hands back he said no so I asked how long he's going to hold them and he said forever (I wish). Of course he won but I put up a good fight. I even managed to throw him off the bed when he started tickling me. Then we went back to kissing and getting horny. I finally grabbed his dick cuz I've been craving it and he was hard (Yay). It took all I had not to give him a blowjob. Ha if that is allowed. We eventually went back to playing the game.

He has to work the next 4 nights so it's doubtful I'll see him. He says if I'm bored I could come up and see him. So I may do that - just to see him for a bit but not until this weekend.

I guess we're going to attempt to go to Magic Mountain again on Monday. I got the day off. I don't know if CS will go but hopefully or I'll be the third wheel and that's no fun.

I've been reading this guy's diary and it's trippin me out cuz he writes (when in pain) the way I feel. It's like reading about my own pain. I never recorded any of that pain here because it was before I had this diary so I just kept one for myself and it was full of misery over my break up. I'm so glad not to be there...in that much pain...but I'm sure I'll be there again with CS but I'll deal with that when I get to it. My heart just goes out to him and all I want to do is hold him, stroke his head (not the naughty one) and make him feel that everything will be alright.