Tidal Wave

Went to dinner with my friend J.G. and his cool sister. They can always make me laugh. Then we came back here and hung out.

M.B. came by later. I wanted to make love with him so bad but didn�t know how to ask and wasn�t even sure if he was interested. Finally I just asked him if he was done having sex with me and he said no. So I asked him if we can, he says yes. Yea I know that sounds extremely romantic but I�m down to the last 24 hours here. So after we eat and I shower, we make our way to the bedroom. Unfortunately he still makes me nervous so I feel awkward and clumsy. Plus we are in a silly mood and I�m having a hard time focusing. So we start kissing and I get so turned on. I never used to get that turned on by just kissing but I know that�s just because I have such strong feelings for him. So I again go down on him and I want him to cum in my mouth so bad but I also want to feel him cum inside me. After I just can�t take it anymore I straddle him and in he goes and over the edge do I fall. Another body trembling experience which makes me start to cry. I just felt so overwhelmed with emotion and then knowing that he�d be gone in 24 hours I couldn�t hold it back.

I feel like I�m holding back a tidal wave of tears with each breath. But sometimes the tears force their way through the sandbags and I have to make repairs constantly. I know that when I say good-bye to him tonight and he drives away, I will no longer have the strength to hold back the wave and it will come crashing down on me and I will drown in it for a long while. I�m pretty fucking scared.

2001-09-02 || 2:23 p.m.


Who Is kokoro13?

A woman just trying to find lasting love with a real man
loves: kissing, reading, video games, falling in love.

hates: working, animal abuse, ignorance, mind games

Favorite Reads
all content � kokoro13, 2003.

the past - the future